I thought about what I want to set for my new goal…. and I have absolutely no idea whatsoever.
I definitely want to get me that bikini by the end of the summer! I tried some on today, and I just….wasn’t comfortable enough with my body to do it yet. So maybe in another 10 pounds or so I’ll be confident enough to buy and wear a bikini. But I don’t think that should be my goal.
I need more time to think on it.
ON THE UP SIDE! (well, there are quite a few upsides to today, it was a good day 😀 )
I have definitely lost a lot of inches, a lot more than I realized. I was shopping, trying on jeans and pants at the Bay…. I fit a size 11. ELEVEN. ELEVEN. HOW FREAKING AMAZING IS THAT. The pants I got are a bit stretchy, so maybe in a normal pair of jeans I’d be around 12 or 13 or so, but I felt SO AMAZING. 14 was too big. I used to wear an 18 in some brands!!!! I have lost THAT MUCH WEIGHT?!?!?! when did this happen?! MWAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAA (triumphant evil laughter)
When I was in Paris and we were packing to come home, we got a scale to weigh our suitcases. I weighed myself…. and my friend (who has always been on the heavier side of thin) was heavier than me. That was my first true taste of success…My first true taste of not being the fattest girl in the room. It felt so good.
And now…I bought a pair of shorts that’s a medium. And pants that are 11. And a swimsuit that’s size 12. and I FIT into a size 8, but the boobs and straps were too small…. My body has kind of been revolutionized. And so has my confidence.
And it’s only getting better.
For god’s sake…I tried on bikinis. And came out into the store to show my mom and the sales lady.
Would I have been able to do that three months ago? Absolutely NOT. But I can now. I have come so far…. It feels so good. I am so proud of myself.
All I have to say to you, my friends, is that setbacks happen, but when you look back in the long run, you still see how far you’ve come. And you feel good. But you always know you can feel better, and there’s always something to strive for.
I still want to work toward my healthy weight of about 155-160 pounds. But I’m not sure I want that to be my goal. I’ll think on it.
Ate well today, except I didn’t consume enough calories during the day and ended up eating too many at night, and now I’m feeling full before bed. But that’s alright. It’s a minor mistake. I only ate about 1300 cals today. Which is darn impressive considering I was out all day, ending up below my optimal level is kind of…not what I would have expected.
Tomorrow is another day, another beginning. I’ll make it a good one.